Haikus of the Ten Plagues  (See Haikus - Steps of the Seder below)
By Lex Rofes, written Passover 2010

Dahm (Blood):
Darn, the river's red.
Don't think it's food coloring...
Vampires feast tonight.

Ts'fardaya (Frogs):
Get out of my face,
Crazy little jumping dudes,
Quite unsettling.

Kinim (Lice/Gnats):
I don't like these flies.
Where is S.C. Johnson now?
Get these Jews some Raid!

Arov (Flies):
Insects everywhere,
Pick on someone your own size,
Not a human being.

Dever (Cattle Disease):
All the cows are sick.
Who can give diagnoses?
We need Doctor House.

Shikhin (Boils):
Boils, what a drag...
I take pride in my smooth skin.
One word for this: gross.

Barad (Hail):
I could deal with snow.
But this hail hurts quite a bit,
Let us go, Pharaoh!

Arbeh (Locusts):
Really G-d, more bugs?
All of these six-leggèd freaks.
What's next, cockroaches?

Choshech (Darkness):
Now I get Ray Charles.
This not-seeing thing's no fun.
Gosh I miss the sun.

Makat Bechorot (Death of the First-Born):
Pharaoh, get a clue.
Don't you want these Hebrews out?
Let us go right now!

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	Haikus - Steps of the Seder

Part 1 - Kadesh
Pesach has begun.
Let's get this party started.
Let us praise our G-d.

Part 2 - Urchatz
Now we wash our hands.
Make ourselves feel fresh and clean.
Then we can move on.

Part 3 - Karpas
Parsley plus water,
Reminds us of years of tears,
Also tastes stellar!

Part 4 - Yachatz
Time to break matzoh,
Someone hides the bigger piece.
Later, we will search.

Part 5 - Magid
Four questions, we ask.
Why's this night so different?
It's time to find out.

Part 6 - Rachatz
Wow, that was good wine!
Next we bless our sacred foods.
Thanks G-d, we like them!

Part 7 - Motzi Matzah
Let us bless matzoh.
It may be bumpy and bland,
But we love it so.

Part 8 - Moror
Now the bitter herb.
It reminds us of our past,
As slaves in Egypt.

Part 9 - Korech
Hillel, what a guy!
His sandwich is ambrosial.
Best part of the meal!

Part 10 - Shulchan Orech
Now the festive meal!
What we've all been waiting for.
Brisket, mmm, mmm, good.

Part 11 - Tzafun
Lotz-a-fun it is.
Looking for afikomen.
Let's solve mom's puzzle!

Part 12 - Barech
Let us thank our G-d.
Getting us out of Egypt,
He (or she...we're gonna be as politically correct as possible here, don't want to upset anyone) deserves some thanks.

Part 13 - Hallel
G-d has helped us out.
He deserves praise, here it is.
G-d, you're grrrrrrrreat!

Part 14 - Nirtzah
We all feel quite full.
Next year in Jerusalem,
We will dine again.